Your pet is your mirror

Your pet is your mirror
If there’s something your pet regularly does that annoys you, pay attention: your pet is telling you something

Communicating successfully with our pets is an age-old topic of fascination. In the majority of cases, the direction is us trying to get a message across to our pets – except in those classic cases when you feel like your animal friend is ‘trying to tell you something’. But the ways in which pets provide feedback may go much deeper than that.

When we do not take heed of how our animals are showing up, they try to get through to us by changing how they act. Granted, this may not always be the reason for troubling behaviour, but if we don’t listen, they will persist, potentially causing major upsets in the family.

How we move, speak and interact has a powerful effect on our animal friends – so it’s no surprise that they are keen to let us know when we are having a negative impact on them, and on others around us.


What can I do to help my animal?

Bianca believes that some animal behaviour should not be tolerated; such behaviour might include barking for no reason, mouthing, or even becoming unfriendly. However, things like plucking feathers, sulking, following you everywhere, staring at you all the time, not eating, or perhaps presenting with the same aches and pains you also experience, are all things we need to be extra diligent about.

You see, animals are sentient beings just like us humans. They also communicate in different ways, and require us to listen to them...just like us.

Bianca has had one of her dogs stare at her for years! She always said to Toby: 'What are you thinking?' Well, it wasn't until she realised she could hear the animals speak to me, that he overloaded me with information. And this came about after a snake approached Bianca in the wild in 2011 to tell her that she needed to go out into the world and ‘do your job...connect animals to the humans’. But that is a story for another day.

Toby was talking so much and quickly that Bianca couldn't make heads or tails of what he was saying! He was too excited to figure out she could finally hear him.

It is so important for us to listen to our pets. Truly listen. Not just with our ears, but also our eyes, and our other senses.

They show us when to pay attention because you know what? They know exactly what is going on for us. They know exactly what we need to focus on. And if we don't listen...bam! They stare at us for hours on end, they change their behaviour, change their eating habits, or away for a little while!

Once we start tuning into our beautiful beloved animals, we will know intuitively what they are telling us.

Bianca invites you to start listening, observe and acknowledge you are listening. You'd be surprised what you learn and pick up from them!


The first step is to observe our animals more closely, rather than talking to them, punishing them or ignoring them. Start by asking yourself the following questions:


  • What am I doing (or not doing) that might be causing this behaviour?
  • What might be happening in our direct environment to create this behaviour?

  • What can we do to change that?


‘As animal lovers, we already know our pets very well. Deep down, we know what may have changed in their world.’

Sometimes, problems like these push us to connect back to ourselves, tune in to our heart and do a stocktake of our life. The important thing here is to actually implement the changes required: only then will our pets adjust their behaviour.

Rami, the cat with the keyboard fetish

Rami was an eight-year-old cat who lived for cuddles and belly rubs. His normally docile behaviour changed over the course of a few weeks when he began sitting on his guardian’s computer keyboard. If she moved him, he would either jump straight back up or turn and bite her.

As she worked from home, it was important to Rami’s mum that this behaviour stopped. At her wits’ end, she called me for help.

Rami was finally able to explain that one of the three roles his guardian undertook as part of her work was actually not suited to her, and she was doing herself a disservice by continuing. Within a month, she had reduced her workload significantly, and Rami returned to his usual snuggly self.

‘Sometimes, problems with our pets’ behaviour push us to connect back to ourselves, tune into our heart and do a stocktake of our life’

The dog that ate her guardian’s undies

A 14.5 yr old female dog started to eat her human’s undies.... she got quite sick and it shocked her human into stopping. She sat with her dog and listened.

She understood that her routine had changed due to her horses’ needs. She had a friend to walk her dog but the dog told her guardian she wanted her back.... she wanted her guardian to walk her again. Their precious and special time together had been compromised.

Her guardian truly listened and changed things immediately and the dog is back to her old happy and connected self.

These are two of many examples Bianca has seen when pets actually do know what’s best for us and will try anything to get that message across!

Take a closer look

As animal lovers, we already know our pets very well. Deep down, we know what may have changed in their world. Even so, Bianca invites you to observe your animal friend more closely for a few days, taking note of the following:

  • Are they asking for more attention?
  • Have their eating habits changed?
  • Are they more vocal?
  • How are their energy levels?
  • What are their sleeping patterns like?
  • Has anything else shifted in their behaviour, no matter how small this might be?
  • Are they staring a lot?
  • Are they following me around everywhere?
  • Has their mood shifted?
  • How are they interacting with their pack and humans? Has anything changed here?


Once you have a clear view of what’s different, ask yourself the questions suggested earlier. Then take a breath, connect with yourself and observe yourself for a few minutes: think about what might have changed about you that is related or similar to what your animal is experiencing. And then, decide what you are going to do to make a correction, or take a step in the direction you truly want.


Together, you and your pet can make a significant impact on each other’s lives, and your relationship and be much happier for it.

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